A 4-week live group coaching experience
Understand the pattern. Rebuild your self-trust. Become more secure.
The Secure Shift is for people who are exhausted by overthinking, chasing clarity, withdrawing, decoding mixed signals or losing themselves inside relationships.
Over four weeks, you will learn how to understand your attachment responses, regulate emotional activation, communicate more securely and make decisions from clarity instead of fear.
Join the waitlistEight live sessions. Maximum eight participants. Practical guidance, honest reflection and support without judgement.
You may be here because...
- Their silence can change your entire day.
- You overanalyse messages, tone and small changes in energy.
- You struggle to tell the difference between intuition and anxiety.
- You keep making yourself smaller to avoid pushing someone away.
- You understand the pattern intellectually, but still feel trapped inside it emotionally.
- You want secure love, but you are not sure what secure behaviour actually looks like.
- You are tired of abandoning yourself while trying to keep a connection.
The goal is not to become better at tolerating inconsistency. It is to become secure enough to understand the pattern, communicate clearly and stop abandoning yourself inside it.
What can begin to change
By the end of the program, you will have practical tools to help you
Understand your pattern
Recognise what activates you, why it happens and how the anxious-avoidant cycle keeps reinforcing itself.
Regulate before reacting
Create space between the trigger and your response, so fear no longer makes every decision for you.
Communicate with more security
Express what you feel and need without chasing, attacking, disappearing or overexplaining.
Build boundaries you can hold
Stop using boundaries to control someone else and start using them to protect your own wellbeing.
Rebuild self-trust
Learn to trust what you observe, what you need and what someone's consistent behaviour is showing you.
Make clearer relationship decisions
Separate love, attachment, hope, fear and compatibility so that you can decide what is actually right for you.
Program structure
Four weeks. Eight live sessions.
Each week includes two different kinds of support.
75 minutes
Weekly teaching and practice session
A structured session where I teach the week's core framework, explain how it appears in real relationships and guide you through practical exercises.
60 minutes
Weekly integration and Q&A session
A smaller, conversational session for questions, reflection, real-life situations and help applying the work to your own patterns.
Program details
- Four weeks
- Two live sessions each week
- Eight live sessions in total
- Maximum eight participants
- Session recordings available for a limited time
- Practical exercises and reflection prompts
- A private, respectful group environment
- Guided opportunities to submit questions between sessions
This does not include unlimited private messaging or crisis support.
Weekly curriculum
What we will work through
Week 1
See the cycle clearly
Understand how attachment responses are activated and how pursuing, withdrawing, overthinking and shutting down reinforce one another. You will begin separating what is happening now from what fear is predicting will happen.
Focus
- Recognising your triggers
- Understanding the anxious-avoidant cycle
- Fear versus observable facts
- Creating a pause before reacting
Week 2
Communicate without losing yourself
Learn how to express feelings, needs and concerns without turning the conversation into pressure, protest or self-erasure.
Focus
- Secure communication
- Asking without chasing
- Taking space without disappearing
- Handling defensiveness and difficult conversations
- Knowing when communication is becoming one-sided
Week 3
Boundaries, standards and self-trust
Move from trying to manage another person's behaviour to becoming clear about what you will participate in.
Focus
- The difference between a boundary and an ultimatum
- Rebuilding trust in your own judgement
- Identifying needs, preferences and non-negotiables
- Stopping the habit of negotiating against yourself
- Responding to inconsistency without abandoning yourself
Week 4
Choose from security
Bring everything together and create a personal plan for moving forward, whether that means repairing a relationship, changing how you participate in it or releasing what cannot meet you.
Focus
- Recognising real change versus temporary reassurance
- Understanding connection versus capacity
- Evaluating consistency and compatibility
- Preparing for future triggers
- Creating your personal Secure Shift plan
The Secure Shift may be right for you if...
- You recognise anxious, avoidant or mixed attachment responses in yourself.
- You feel trapped in a push-pull relationship dynamic.
- You are dating, partnered, separated or recovering from a breakup.
- You want to understand someone else without making them your entire focus.
- You are ready to look honestly at your own side of the pattern.
- You want practical tools, not generic advice to “just leave” or “love yourself more.”
- You are willing to participate respectfully in a small group.
Attachment patterns can change over time. You do not need to decide that you or someone else “is” an anxious or avoidant person to benefit from this program.
This program is not the right fit if...
- You are looking for a strategy to make a specific person return.
- You want help manipulating someone's attachment responses.
- You need emergency, crisis, medical or mental health treatment.
- You are currently in an unsafe or abusive situation requiring specialist support.
- You are not willing to respect the privacy of other group members.
- You want someone else to change, but are not open to examining your own patterns.
This first cohort is designed for individuals. It is not couples coaching, although your relationship may naturally be part of what you explore.
About Saska
Guidance from someone who has lived the pattern
I spent years inside an anxious-avoidant relationship, including three breakups, no contact and the painful push-pull cycle that made both of us feel misunderstood.
The relationship changed when we stopped treating each other as the problem and began taking responsibility for our individual patterns. Today, we have built a loving, secure relationship.
I now use that lived experience to help others understand these dynamics without losing themselves inside them.
Investment
First cohort investment
$397
Includes
- Eight live group sessions across four weeks
- Four structured teaching and practice sessions
- Four integration and Q&A sessions
- Practical exercises and reflection prompts
- Limited-time access to session recordings
- A personal Secure Shift plan
- A small group of no more than eight participants
Payment option
- Pay in full
- $397
- Or two payments of
- $215
Applications will be reviewed before enrollment to make sure the program is an appropriate fit.
Joining the waitlist does not commit you to applying, enrolling or making a payment.
Founding cohort
Join the Secure Shift waitlist
Be the first to hear when applications open, including the dates, exact session schedule and enrollment details.
Joining the waitlist is free and does not commit you to participating.
FAQ
Frequently asked questions
Is this therapy?
No. The Secure Shift is an educational group coaching program based on lived experience, practical tools and attachment-informed guidance. It is not therapy, medical care or crisis support.
Do I need to be in a relationship?
No. You can join while dating, partnered, separated, in no contact or recovering from a breakup. The focus is your relationship with your own patterns, choices and emotional security.
Is this only for anxiously attached people?
No. The program is open to people who recognise anxious, avoidant or mixed responses in themselves. These are patterns, not fixed personality labels.
Can I join with my partner?
This first cohort is designed for individuals rather than couples. Couples coaching may be offered separately.
Will you tell me whether I should stay or leave?
No one can make that decision for you. I will help you separate fear, hope, attachment, behaviour and compatibility so you can make a clearer decision for yourself.
What if I cannot attend every session live?
Sessions will be recorded and available for a limited time. However, live participation is encouraged because the integration and Q&A sessions are an important part of the experience.
How large will the group be?
The group will be limited to eight participants to keep it personal, supportive and interactive.
When does the program begin?
The dates are being finalised. Join the waitlist to receive the schedule before applications open publicly.
Does joining the waitlist reserve my place?
No. The waitlist gives you early access to the dates and application. Places are only confirmed after acceptance and payment.
Are results guaranteed?
No. Your experience will depend on your circumstances, participation and willingness to apply the work. The program offers education, reflection and practical tools, not guaranteed personal or relationship outcomes.
You do not have to keep losing yourself to understand someone else.
You can care about the relationship and still become more secure within yourself.
Join the waitlist and be the first to know when applications for The Secure Shift open.
Free to join. No commitment. Maximum eight places in the first cohort.
The Secure Shift is educational group coaching. It is not therapy, medical care or crisis support, and no outcome is guaranteed. If you need urgent help, please contact your local emergency service. What this is and is not.